"Who is this?"

"I’ve reluctantly discarded the notion of my continuing to manage the portfolio after my death – abandoning my hope to give new meaning to the term ‘thinking outside the box’"

"On the day the Jérôme Kerviel story broke, we had two options for the lead story on the main news bulletin: SG, or the official inquiry’s report on the maltreatment of Iraqi prisoners by British soldiers. It had found that the abuses were isolated incidents rather than systematic failures. A bit like SG claimed..."

"The headlines continue to be dominated by its fate. Northern Rock, however, is not the epicentre of the present global banking crisis"

Passenger One: "Well, it’s been an amazing journey. We set out to do something different and we’ve learnt a lot."

January

"If the shoe was on the other foot, if these were sovereign wealth investors in France, Germany, the UK or the US earning fabulous returns, reducing national deficits, funding social security costs and investing into the rest of the world, would they think it was an issue? I suspect not"

"They danced with some good-looking girls but they danced with some ugly ones as well"

"Once you get a contract, unless you screw it up, you get the renewal"

When market turn sour the investment banking industry has a nice line in gallows humour. Here’s a selection of what senior bankers told Euromoney in August.

"In some cases the commitment of larger banking institutions has run ahead of the expertise and knowledge that currently exists. And that’s OK. It’s right to try to understand the best ways to maximize the opportunities. It’s a massive shift, and it’s going to pick up speed and be one of the largest movements in the history of business"

"My only expectation is that I am going to continue to work my ass off"

"Algorithmic trading can be shit sometimes"

"And what drives me? I want to create a huge empire. That is what drives me. And as long as God is willing and gives me strength and I am healthy, I will do that"

"Japan’s companies had better make use of the advantage of being in the Asian region. The urgent task for them is to promote localization in Asia, in order to secure from European and US firms the fruits that this prospering economy brings forth"

"Brazil and Mexico explain Latin America. The rest is beautiful places for a holiday"

“Whereas western European banks are afraid to go to the Balkans because they’re not used to the environment of corruption, black money and illegal activities, we are used to this here in Greece”

“People say there’s no distressed debt. Well, there is; it’s just not trading at distressed prices”

“Another pandemic or a large event risk such as a full-scale ground war, or various nuclear bombs exploding in large cities in any of the three countries would cause a loss for the noteholders”

“A private equity play in China is exactly that – a private equity play. The price may go up or down, but that’s not a China strategy”

“The phoenix will rise again”

“I’d rather put needles in my eyes than give you a mandate!”

“Oh, these are among the most toxic instruments we’ve created. And they’re absolutely a bull market instrument. In a bear market, it’s not a question of maybe losing just a percentage point. You can lose 10 points in a heartbeat.”

“We’ve made $100 billion of investments in the past few years. We have to be number one in every product, in every market. We have no choice. There’s no other way to go.”

“Some of the other banks closed their internet offerings at 9pm. Just think about that for a minute. ‘The internet is closed.’”

“What surprised me when I became minister of finance was that we had the debt situation, but nobody wanted to talk about it. We need to first explain how we got into this position before we can talk about how we will get out of it.”

“Around three years ago we read in Euromoney and other serious financial publications that we had a big problem with our banks. So we decided to do something about it... and that is why we have achieved what we have achieved in reforming the bank sector.”

“You ask a hedge fund manager how quickly can they do a deal. And they reply: ‘Is tomorrow quick enough?’”

"One thing we can say definitively is that we do not have a desire to be a bulge-bracket investment bank. Ours is a more measured approach. We will only grow domestically and internationally where our client base and potential client base leads us."

"I'm not interested in being prime minister. That'd be a demotion. I'm Tony Blair and the Queen in one!"